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Geezer
10-06-08, 11:21 AM
are a bunch of fucking useless cunting fucking cunters.

I tried to transfer my insurance over to a new car the other day and spent over two hours trying to do so. I got through to banglidesh, bangalaw, bangthemilkman and bangmyheadagansthewall. I finally got through to someone who could just about understand me and finally thought I was getting somewhere. I was told it would cost me £30 more and that my premium last year was £230 making it £260 for the new car. I had already got a quote whilst trying to get through and it was for £210. I said that I might as well just start again and do it online, he said I could but I would have to cancel my policy and that would cost me £52 :noway2:
I asked what I had to pay £52 for and was told to cancel my policy, I said "no, what am i actually paying, £52 for someone to press a key on their computer?".

Anyway I fucked them off and went with www.swiftcover.com I got a quote in minutes online, I then paid, £144 by the fucking way and then printed of my policy so I could get the tax.

Today I thought I would cancel my Norwich Union policy, after my usual travels around the world I finally got a woman who sounded like she might actually be able to just about grasp the English language. I had to give her my registration number so I did and of course she couldn't fucking get it. She then repeated what she thought I said phonetically, so she said "blaah blah blah blah Oscar Sierra Alpha, I said "no its F" she asked "S for "Sierra" I said "no F for Fuck", I did hear a little giggle. So after all this fucking about she then tells me she can't access my policy because of a system error and I would have to call back later. I told her bollocks up her arsehole.

Unbelievably unbelievable ARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG :banghead:

JT
10-06-08, 11:25 AM
I got through to some banglidesh, bangalaw, bangthemilkman and bangmyheadagansthewall.

Bangalist

Geezer
10-06-08, 11:26 AM
Bangalist

:takethat:

JT
10-06-08, 11:26 AM
Joking aside with all, these bangles it sounds like a Manic Monday :)

S.D.
10-06-08, 11:32 AM
Think I might adopt Geezers Phonetic alphabet on the phone from now on:

A = Arsehole
B = Bollocks
C = Cunt !
etc,etc

:)

psl
10-06-08, 01:11 PM
Were all the phone calls recorded for training purposes?

Geezer
10-06-08, 01:13 PM
Were all the phone calls recorded for training purposes?

I hope so

rogue
10-06-08, 01:28 PM
have you tried Tescos car insurance? its very good AND you get clubcard points :)

Jase
10-06-08, 01:29 PM
£144? What are you insuring? A bicycle?

nekrom
10-06-08, 03:00 PM
£144? What are you insuring? A bicycle?

Geezer on a bicycle? :gaylords:

-N

adultbusiness
10-06-08, 03:03 PM
£144? What are you insuring? A bicycle?

lol

mOBSCENE
10-06-08, 04:05 PM
£144? What are you insuring? A bicycle?

An old banga?

smoothballs
10-06-08, 07:15 PM
Geezer on a bicycle? :gaylords:

-N


nah Geezer on a chainsaw :)

know you mean though hate those fucking foreign call centres

my landline is crap and my hearing isnt great anyway, so if i get a cold call which I shouldnt do as i opted out online to be on marketeers lists the odd one comes thru....

them " hellooo mayee speak to INSERT FULL NAME HERE"

me "speaking"

them " blah blah I am calling on behalf of WE DONT SPEAK THE ENGLIEESH WELL!"

me "eh?"

them " blah blah I am calling on behalf of WE DONT SPEAK THE ENGLIEESH WELL!"

me "sorry I cant understand you"

them " blah blah I am calling on behalf of WE DONT SPEAK THE ENGLIEESH WELL!"

me "sorry?"

them " blah blah I am calling on behalf of WE DONT SPEAK THE ENGLIEESH WELL!"

me "sorry I cant hear you very well"

them " blah blah I am calling on behalf of WE DONT SPEAK THE ENGLIEESH WELL!"

me "sorry?"

them "are you INSERT FULL NAME HERE"

me "yes"

them " blah blah I am calling on behalf of WE DONT SPEAK THE ENGLIEESH WELL!"

me "eh? your calling from who?"

them " blah blah I am calling on behalf of WE DONT SPEAK THE ENGLIEESH WELL!"

me "sorry?"

them " ahhhh...." click! works every time!


my faves are the engilsh ones that offer double glazing, home improvements ect, so I'm like "yeah sounds cool,wouldn't mind that!"

them "so can we send someone round to talk to you about this more?"

me"not up to me mate, I'm with a housing association, they do all the neccessary work for me :)"

them "click"

just glad to wasted a cold caller precious commission time! :)