View Full Version : Major LA star comes to the UK
strictlybroadband
03-19-07, 05:02 PM
Big-name LA porn star Fifi La Douche has moved to the UK and is writing exclusively and entertainingly for Strictly News. As you'll all know, Fifi is as big as they come. You can contact Fifi via me.
Read her first letter home:
http://www.strictlynews.com/sbn/live/Articles/gossip/letter-to-usa-1.html
Fifi who? doe she know Pepe Le Pew
xcite-tv
03-19-07, 05:10 PM
This quote from the newletter will endear her no end
"A word about the Brits. OH MY GOD how did these people ever build an empire? These people are dumb, ugly, inbred and stuck up. Their weather is shit, their food sucks, and their banking system can't have been updated since Shakespeare's time! I can't use dollars anywhere so have had to change all my money into their local joke currency. A Big Mac costs, like, eight dollars (not that money is any object to me, although cash flow has been a little tight lately, what with having to skip bail in LA and my relocation expenses).
Darlings, I want to write more, and I will soon. I have SO MUCH DIRT to deliver on the pathetic scum who call themselves the British porn industry. But time flies, and time is money, so I'll love you and leave you, and write again very soon."
Another classic cunt from over there !!!!
sounds charming :)
A word about the Brits. OH MY GOD how did these people ever build an empire? These people are dumb, ugly, inbred and stuck up. Their weather is shit, their food sucks, and their banking system can't have been updated since Shakespeare's time! I can't use dollars anywhere so have had to change all my money into their local joke currency. A Big Mac costs, like, eight dollars (not that money is any object to me, although cash flow has been a little tight lately, what with having to skip bail in LA and my relocation expenses).
Darlings, I want to write more, and I will soon. I have SO MUCH DIRT to deliver on the pathetic scum who call themselves the British porn industry. But time flies, and time is money, so I'll love you and leave you, and write again very soon.
"I have SO MUCH DIRT to deliver on the pathetic scum who call themselves the British porn industry."
Must be the company she's keeping.
xcite-tv
03-19-07, 05:16 PM
"I have SO MUCH DIRT to deliver on the pathetic scum who call themselves the British porn industry."
Must be the company she's keeping.
That was the ONE quote she got right !!!
Sounds just like some shemale wanker we had posting here for a while.
She sounds like another thick yank bird, why the fuck would anyone take dollars?, can you imagine trying to spend sterling in America, well any other country.
Oh the joy, another gobby fucking sceptic who hates us all but still wants to live over here.
My message to Fifi via you strictly is if you dont like it here then fuck off back to where you came from.
Pandemos
03-19-07, 05:34 PM
I think it's supposed to be satire, or something. After all, it's not as if she exists.
Kinky John
03-19-07, 05:38 PM
she should leave the satire to us . . it's not working
so you hiring bail jumpers now Jerry ? . . haha nice one
she should leave the satire to us . . it's not working
so you hiring bail jumpers now Jerry ? . . haha nice one
I think Jerry is playing a small joke on his English (and Russian) chums :)
Kinky John
03-19-07, 05:48 PM
I think Jerry is playing a small joke on his English (and Russian) chums :)
lol thanks . . i worked that one out . . just playing along
strictlybroadband
03-19-07, 05:57 PM
Sorry boys, was just out to lunch with Fifi. She's much nicer face to face.
If you have anything you'd like her to investigate, pass it on and I'll make sure she gets to write about it.
:)
mOBSCENE
03-19-07, 06:18 PM
Expose on Dorset vice squad?
dvtimes
03-19-07, 06:29 PM
What does it mean that she is exclusive to you?
is that content or just she will wtite a few lines of text.
also can you post a pic.
If you have anything you'd like her to investigate, pass it on and I'll make sure she gets to write about it.
Here's three for her to be getting on with:
- 9/11 conspiracy theories
- BBFC policy making past, present and future
- the speeches of Dwight D. Eisenhower
MelnAdam
03-19-07, 06:44 PM
She can investigate my pants - pmsl
Will she be coming to the showcase?
Adam
I can't use dollars anywhere so have had to change all my money into their local joke currency.
Oh no, she cannot spend her dollars in British shops? You know that is an excuse for the yankie doodles to invade don't you. The stupid bitch is obviously another person who thinks the world should bow down to the inbred stars and stripes.
strictlybroadband
03-19-07, 07:21 PM
She can investigate my pants - pmsl
Will she be coming to the showcase?
No, she'll be far too busy. Probably for the best as it doesn't pay to be noticed by her...
Cardinal_Sin
03-19-07, 07:27 PM
Sorry boys, was just out to lunch with Fifi. She's much nicer face to face.
If you have anything you'd like her to investigate, pass it on and I'll make sure she gets to write about it.
:)
Get the big mouthed cunt to investigate what happened to my cheque from stricktlybroadband.
strictlybroadband
03-19-07, 07:30 PM
Get the big mouthed cunt to investigate what happened to my cheque from stricktlybroadband.
PMing you...
MelnAdam
03-19-07, 07:45 PM
No, she'll be far too busy. Probably for the best as it doesn't pay to be noticed by her...
Oh, that's sounds scarey, I'm shaking in my pants now, why, what would she do?
Adam
mOBSCENE
03-19-07, 07:47 PM
also can you post a pic.
preferably of her doing some kind of anal gaping :cheers2:
strictlybroadband
03-19-07, 08:15 PM
Oh, that's sounds scarey, I'm shaking in my pants now, why, what would she do?
As you've noticed, she has a very uncompromising journalistic style...
xcite-tv
03-19-07, 09:32 PM
If you have anything you'd like her to investigate, pass it on and I'll make sure she gets to write about it.
:)
Global warming
chris@uk-pornogirls.com
03-20-07, 02:59 PM
:gaylords: LMFAO very very funny loving the fact some peeps just don't get it :D:)
strictlybroadband
03-20-07, 04:10 PM
Global warming
I phoned her - turns out she doesn't believe in global warming. Go figure.
xcite-tv
03-20-07, 04:44 PM
I phoned her - turns out she doesn't believe in global warming. Go figure.
I might have called her a cunt but i still agree with everything she said...
drunken
03-20-07, 04:56 PM
"I can't use dollars anywhere so have had to change all my money into their local joke currency."
dearie dearie dearie me
Our joke currency is worth twice as much as your mickey mouse shite - hence the $8 big mac. anyway enjoy our shit food and bad weather.
WordsforHire
03-20-07, 05:35 PM
I'm not getting the joke.
ukbukkake
03-20-07, 09:15 PM
I'm not getting the joke.
Me neither but didnt want to say it! But now you have I will too!!
Had a MAJOR bad day today so not sure if thats the reason I dont get it?!
Jock Strap
03-20-07, 10:26 PM
Me neither but didnt want to say it! But now you have I will too!!
Had a MAJOR bad day today so not sure if thats the reason I dont get it?!
Well...put it this way. You'll never see Fifi La Douche and Jerry in the same room at the same time. She's sort of like Tyler Durden except she's a bird. She's a result of Jerry's worsening schizophrenia and gives him a nice excuse to cross-dress.
WordsforHire
03-20-07, 10:28 PM
Tyler Durden ? Fifi La Douche? Isnt douching something to do with flushing out your ass?
Nice to see you back around here babe :)
Jock Strap
03-20-07, 10:29 PM
Tyler Durden ? Fifi La Douche? Isnt douching something to do with flushing out your ass?
Nice to see you back around here babe :)
Thanks.
Sad, isn't it. I've got nothing better to do. :(
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